If you are expecting multiples, your doctor should have already talked with you about the need to take it easy and not overexert yourself to try to avoid strict bed rest.  For instance, when I was pregnant with my twins I only did light housework and my husband did all the vacuuming and heavy lifting in the household.  My doctor had me lie down for 15-20 minutes every morning and afternoon starting at 25 weeks.  We had been waiting a long time for the chance to have children and I didn’t want to take any chances, so I followed my doctor’s orders to the letter.

The higher the order multiples you are expecting, the less work and more rest your doctor will want you to do.  If you are expecting triplets, most doctors will suggest resting 2-3 times per day starting at about 21 weeks.  If you are expecting quadruplets, some doctors will suggest resting 2-3 times per day starting at 18 weeks and some doctors will require bed rest starting at 18 weeks.

Doctors suggest resting or bed rest for good reason.  For every day your babies stay inside of you they have an increased chance of being born healthy and spending less time in the NICU.  Doctors typically hope for 34-36 weeks for twins, 32-34 weeks for triplets and at least 30 weeks for quadruplets.  Believe it or not, there is a huge difference between 33 weeks and 33 weeks five days.  As you are trying to take care of yourself and your babies during your pregnancy, resting and bed rest become crucial.

If you experience any complications or preterm labor, doctors will begin to order (not suggest) strict bed rest.  Going from a suggestion to an order means that your doctor is very concerned and that preterm birth is imminent if you do not slow down and take it easy.

If you are now at the point of being on bed rest as you are reading this, there are some things you need to keep in mind to help you through this time.  First of all, learn to let things go.  Your house can be dusted and vacuumed when it gets dusted and vacuumed and laundry can wait too.  Chances are your spouse and your family are hopefully helping around the house when they can and what doesn’t get done one day will keep for the next.  At this point your main job and focus is on delivering healthy babies and that is all everyone cares about.  It doesn’t matter if you can write your name in dust on the TV.  What matters is your health and your babies’ health, so let it go.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help.  If someone offers to go for groceries for you or clean your house or walk your dog, say “yes”.  They ask because they truly want to help and you answer yes because you truly need it.  When I was on bed rest in the hospital for three weeks because my son’s water broke at 28 weeks, my husband played superman for as long as he could until he became exhausted.  We learned to say “yes” and write thank you notes expressing our gratitude.

If you have other children in the household, strict bed rest might be impossible.  However, you need to rest as much as possible or your home bed rest will become hospital bed rest and being away from them will be extremely hard.  Again, ask for help with them.  Make arrangements for play dates with other children and have their parents either come to your house and supervise or take your child to their house.  Enjoy snuggle time with your child.  You can read books, watch movies and do easy craft projects together.  Chances are they will enjoy the fact that they have your undivided attention.

Whether you are just beginning your pregnancy with multiples or have reached the point of needing daily rest or bed rest, I can not stress enough how important it is to follow your doctor’s orders.  One of the biggest responsibilities of parenthood is to ensure that your babies get here safely and soundly.  The best way to do this is to get as much rest as possible, take care of yourself and keep yourself healthy as well.

When choosing a stroller for our twins, we did a lot of research to decide what the best stroller was for us.  We did research online and talked to other parents of twins about what they like and don’t like about their strollers.  What we have learned over the past two years is that you essentially need more than one stroller when dealing with twins.

When our children were born, we received a Graco DuoGlider. This travel system has served us well over the past two years.  When the twins were first born, the travel system was an awesome feature.  The car seats both fit snuggly and securely in the stroller itself.  This allowed us to transfer sleeping babies from car to stroller without waking them up.  This is a front and back stroller not a side by side stroller which allowed for easier mobility in stores and malls.  Most people recommended a front/back stroller because it can be difficult to maneuver a side by side stroller down skinny isles in stores.

The one thing that our stroller lacked was having both seats recline completely so that as they got older they couldn’t nap in the stroller.  This was not a big deal for us as our son did not nap in public because he didn’t want to miss anything and he really slept best when he was home in the crib anyway.  This worked out great for his twin sister who was always free to have the back seat to snooze when we were out.  Most side by side strollers have a feature where either both seats completely and independently.

As our children grew, we made the purchase of individual umbrella strollers.  When my husband and I go out together with the twins, we both take a stroller.  This allows for even easier mobility and we can go to different sides of the store to shop.  This is particularly helpful if they are not in a shopping mood that day as we can get it done in a jiffy if we split up in the store.  Also, my son likes to be on the move if he is strapped in a stroller, so we can keep him moving if need be while my daughter relaxes and waits.  We chose the Jeep umbrella strollers.  They have a canopy to keep out the sun, small pockets on the sides of the frame and are sturdier than a cheap umbrella stroller, yet they are still affordable at just $30 each.  We still keep the Graco DuoGlider for when I venture out alone with them.

I have now convinced myself that my next stroller purchase will be a used double jogging stroller.  The DuoGlider worked great for walks when they were smaller, but as they have gotten bigger I feel like it doesn’t always maneuver well over rocks, etc. on the road.   After much research both online and through a local multiples group, two double jogging strollers are continuously mentioned.  One is the Baby Trend Expedition Double Jogging Stroller and the other is the Schwinn Safari TT Double Jogging Stroller.  Sometimes I like to mall walk in the cold weather and I feel that a double jogging stroller will also help the ride be smoother and more maneuverable provided I don’t feel like shopping and walking down cramped store isles that day.

Now that they are almost two years old we are at the point of not taking them out in their strollers all he time.  However, we still do when we go into a store with breakables or when I take them out by myself.  I am happy with the choices that we have made with our strollers.  I hope that these tips about strollers and stroller research help you in choosing the right stroller for you and your twins.

When registering for baby items for my twins, I was gravitating towards matching toys, but, luckily, my common sense told me otherwise.  We received different bouncy seats, swings, johnny jump ups and other small toys and this worked well because when they got bored, we could just swap toys and they were ready to play all over again.  The only identical items we got were the exersaucers and playmats.  When they got bored, they just got bored and we had to move onto other things.  Any mom of multiples can tell you that the short period of time they are occupied with these toys is important for us to be able to cook, clean, do laundry, etc.  When you have bored multiples, you can’t get any of that done and keep up with toddlers who are exploring or young babies who are crying.

When you have multiples, your toys multiply as well and with good reason.  In addition to the benefit of being able to swap toys, you have the opportunity for your children to explore a variety of different toys together and individually.  Also, if you have one riding car and three kids who want to ride it, that is just a recipe for disaster!  We have found that two riding cars and two push toys have been the best gifts for them.  They literally will chase each other around for hours on end and will stop, switch toys and take off again.  They have also already learned to negotiate the toy swap and to learn that, even if the other one doesn’t want to swap, they still have a similar toy to play with.

This doesn’t mean that I suggest having a two of every toy.  After all, they need to learn the importance of sharing, playing together and playing separately.  Some of the items that we have chosen to buy by itself have included alphabet blocks, stacking blocks, little people accessories, the Peek-a-Block Incrediblock and musical instruments.  They usually do well playing and sharing with these.  When there is a disagreement, we have turned into a learning experience so that they know they can’t take toys away from each other or keep all the toys to themselves.

We also keep a wide variety of books on hand.  Sometimes they want to read at the same time and sometimes one reads while the other one plays. When I am reading to them, I have them take turns bringing me books and they both sit on my lap at the same time.

While we try to buy them individual gifts for special occasions, they always end up sharing them.  For now, we have not entered into the “mine” stage.  This summer we are going to put a sandbox, playhouse and climb and slide in the yard.  Again, we thought this would be great since they can play together or separately, whatever they choose.

As you prepare to register for toys your multiples or head to the store to buy toys, I hope you find these tips helpful.  It is good to mix up the toys and have a variety of the same type of toys as well as not duplicating some of the toys.  You want them to be happy and learn to play well together, with others and by themselves.  Much of this is learned by how they play at home.

When we found out we were having twins and started preparing for their arrival, we began to set up the nursery.  Having heard all the “sweet” stories of how twins had shared the same room and slept better and woke up talking and playing together, we just automatically assumed this would be our case and we prepared one nursery for them both.

When they first came home, they slept side by side in our room.  This worked for a while, but if one woke up first, the other one would automatically wake up even though they were still sleepy.  As we transitioned them to the nursery, we discovered the same thing was happening, even though they had separate beds on opposite sides of the room.

They also have different sleeping habits and needs.  My daughter likes to be snuggled when she is tired and to fall asleep either in your arms or in the crib if there is background noise such as a TV or the radio.  I think if she hears voices she feels like she is still part of the crowd and will not miss out on anything.  She also requires an additional 1-1 ½ hours of play at night.  My son, on the other hand, wants you to give him his snuggly and pacifier, close the door and get out!  He likes to fall asleep on his own, with a sound machine on in the background and nothing else and when he is ready for bed, he is READY for bed.

What is the result of these sleeping differences?  We currently have one crib shoved into our bedroom for my daughter, my son has his very own room and we have plans to add onto our house this summer.  We thought the addition would wait until they were four or five years old.

Of course, this is just our experience and everyone has their own multiples sleeping/nursery stories.  I have a good friend whose twins wake up in the morning and play, passing objects between cribs and holding hands for about 45 minutes before they want out of the crib.  I also have a friend with quads that still share a bedroom five years later because they can’t stand to sleep apart.

My biggest suggestion regarding sharing nurseries is that it is ok to try sharing one, but be prepared to be open and flexible if it doesn’t work.  My twins are happier to see each other than anyone else when they wake up, they just don’t want to share in the joys of slumber together.

When my twins were born, they came early and spent over one month in the NICU.  When they finally came home, I was juggling feeding, sleeping and playing schedules.  I had one twin that wanted to be breast fed, one that wanted the bottle and I had to pump in between to alleviate the any guilt that my bottle fed baby would receive anything other than breast milk. So my day was feed, feed, pump and about 30 minutes until I started all over again…24 hours/day.  In between I wanted to play with them and interact with them for the little time they were awake, oh and yeah a nap and food for me was somewhat important.

The day I discovered that I could feed them both at the same time with a little careful maneuvering literally was a day that changed my life in twin world.  I discovered this about the time they turned 3 months old.  When I was done feeding them, I didn’t know what to do with my extra 2 hours in between.  I had a little play time and then I could either nap with them or have a moment to myself to make a phone call or check emails or read a magazine.

Since this discovery, my biggest tip and suggestion for parents-to-be of multiples is to start them on the same schedule from the beginning.  If you are breastfeeding, then breastfeed them at the same time.  For higher order multiples, this might still mean having two different feeding shifts or bottle feeding one at the same time you are breastfeeding two.  For babies that are all bottle fed, feed them at the same time as well.  This might mean switching out which baby you hold each time so that they all get direct face-to-face feeding time with you.  For me, having one baby in my arms and the other propped up in my lap while I fed them both worked best.  That way I didn’t feel like either one was left out.

When keeping the same schedules, you need to learn to be a little flexible.  For instance, one child might wake up 30 minutes before the rest.  You might have to start feeding that one and then break to get the other ones started and finish them all at the same time.  With my twins, when one woke up earlier, I enjoyed the one on one play time and I believe it was important for them as well.  They usually just played until the other one woke up and then ate together.

If you have someone helping you with some baby shifts, this also helps you to maintain a schedule.  Whether it is a spouse, relative or friend, sharing shifts and baby time is another way to keep you on schedule and sane.

So, as you prepare to welcome your little ones into the world or if they are already here and you are just searching for a way to help you, consider starting them on a schedule today.  They sooner you do, the sooner everything will fall into place and be more manageable.  It certainly helped me with my twin journey.  In fact, as I write this, my soon to be two year olds are both taking their afternoon nap!